Friday, February 17, 2017

Anniversary

This morning, my phone dinged with a text from my friend Molly. She asked me, "How are you going to celebrate the two-year anniversary of your first published piece?" I stared at it, and thought, I'm boiling eggs. I have no plans. What's there to celebrate? Cake sounds good, though.

Coincidentally or ironically, I'd just left the computer where I'd been watching Carrie Wilkerson, a stranger to me, declare this on a highlight video from a writer's conference:

Procrastination is fear. 
Perfectionism is another word for procrastination 
that sounds nicer, like we're better than we are. 
Stop it. 
Stop it. 
Don't be a perfectionist. Be a progressionist. 

Alright already. So where am I? Since my first piece was published, I have cultivated a book concept and fleshed out a proposal for it with two dear friends. I started this blog. I have written freelance articles for a luggage company and a non-profit organization. 

At the end of January 2016, I quit my job, thinking it was time to stop slinging coffee and go after this writing thing, to pursue what I've enjoyed since middle school. The year had other plans, and I questioned who would want to hear my voice. 

As 2017 began, my church's new pastor began speaking about feedback and challenged us to ask someone this question:

What's the one thing I'm doing,
or failing to do,
that's getting in my own way?


I haven't asked anyone this question yet, but I'm thinking I should--because I'm stuck. I don't know how to move forward. Essentially, I'm procrastinating, not only because I'm a perfectionist. I'm afraid I don't have what it takes, and that what I've invested energy in isn't going to go anywhere because I don't know what to do next.

Perhaps I'm the one getting in my own way.


Author Update: Three minutes after I published this, a woman I did not know called to ask me if I'd write an ebook for her. My God is the God Who sees (Genesis 16:13)!